Tuesday, January 19, 2010

a romantically desperate poem :P


There's nothing much up happening in my life... just school work and a lot of it!
But today was a bit more relaxed than the days before... one of my teachers were absent and I had like 4 free periods! so I chilled a bit....
I am still spending like 2 hours every night doing nothing, absolutely nothing, but thinking about my life and trying to discover who I am and what I want in life...
It's quite enjoyable but also a bit scary... what your mind can bring up.

I'll share with you a poem I once wrote for someone I used to like... but then we never got along after some misunderstanding happened between us...
This piece does not necessarily reflect what I felt for one particular person but rather what many people meant to me... it's like things repeat themselves:

What did you ask for… Hatred?
Coz that’s what I got in awe
Was it fooling me what you wanted?
Coz that’s where I stand right now

I used to dream
To dream about what I never dared
I used to dream
About our story being bared

I respected and trusted you…
I cared about you…
And became dependent when…
I finally dared to Love you

You told me nice words
From my head flew birds
And Butterflies in my tummy
Made me believe you’re my honey

I longed to tell you
How I felt, What I felt
I wished I have told you
My heart for you would melt

Before the spring had come
I trusted our flowers to blossom
I had absolute No doubt
That soon we will become...

PS: the people who are addressed by this, have not read it and will hopefully never do


Micky said...

You really shouldn't worry too much about who you are - if you fantasise about boys that's fine. If your computer will let you, go & look at some picture blogs and enjoy getting your rocks off!

My advice would be to get your feet in blogland coz you'll go on meeting new people (and pretty much most of us are gay - you can read my Profile and stuff) so you'll probs find it's much easier to talk about gay stuff in a while.

We may also have experiences between us which might help with 'coming out' when you want to start doing that.

Getting a blog going can be one of the most liberating things for a gay guy!

Jason Carwin came out last year - to his family and everything - and wrote loads about it. You might find it good to graze through his stuff, if you don't know him already. I'm sure he'll be happy to talk with you too.


Sam said...

this helps a lot
Actually, I went into this blog world for I felt it really is liberating and . I have been following some blogs for some years but never had a blog myself. This year, I chose to get one because I have to make up my mind and speak up! I love the supporting system existing in here.