Saturday, January 23, 2010

I also sit here crying....

Hello!

I have just read the post "I sit here Crying" by “Of The Male Persuasion” and I found myself crying too.
I did NOT literally cry that much because I was in a public space but I felt so bad and I could feel that tears could easily pop out of my eyes… My heart did that thing which I don’t know how to explain... it kinda shrunk and I felt as if some strong acid went through it.

I am feeling so bad right now…
As I posted before; I’ve been lately feeling good about myself and no longer thinking I am wrong and odd. I’ve been happy for not questioning my sexuality and just going with the flow. I have been able to forget for a bit about how my life will be turned upside down if I decide I am bi or gay (still finding out) and if I start coming out…
But that post reminded me that worst is yet to come… I am so far from being any ready for that painful path…

I appreciate “Of The Male Persuasion” for sharing his experience with us and making me come back to reality… I am glad his Mom is understanding and I admire his courage!

I will see what I can do for now to get over my sadness… here comes reality to hit back in the face :(

Sad but honest

3 comments:

xXxJoshuaxXx said...

Yo Sammy.

Awww, don't be sad! Although i understand the feeling we must rather feel inspired. I mean his mother was so supportive about it! One can only hope for such a good reaction!

Check ur inbox!

Tommy said...

Hey.
I've just read all your old posts.
I didn't know my post could have such an affect on someone. Dont feel like you have to come out or apply labels to yourself. You have to be completely ready and comfortably within yourself before you can tell other people. Start with someone you feel completely comfortable with and who will understand you. Your friend Mary, perhaps (maybe just start by saying you're bi). Then maybe she can help you come out to other people. I hope it all goes well for you

Sam said...

Thank you Tommy... I understand
I also read most of your posts and could identify myself with the majority of the things you said...

I will let things flow for now... there is not much I can do anyway .. but see how life drives me

Thanks again, buddy!